Week 11

I'd like to Buy one of Greg's Fancy Shmancy Cues

iTeam 10 
Kick Ash 5

They played a fucking good match against us. Irina really played well. She kicked my sorry ass in game one (so much for 1800!) and then took out Johnny in game 2. Also, she's pregnant and her rack is massive.I guess it always was, so it's massiver. Pregnant women are said to have "the glow". Maybe the glow is just big titties. Anyway. I digress.


The tough part of the schedule is about to begin. Now we find out what we are really made of. Tofu?

Peter Roxburgh told me tonight that he hasn't seen a team as good as Loft Steel (or did he say Styx?) since joining the Itaewon Pool League in 1854.

Anyway, June had her first singles loss since pre-Historic times and Kyle is still doling out money to get new players. Good segue-way? I got all hot and sweaty carrying Dewey's Balls around all day. Johnny likes Pussy. He said pussy about 30 times tonight. He really got a kick out of it. His new nickname is Corner Pocket Rocket Johnny, side-pocket Johnny is no more. Or just call him "the Hex" -- cause he helped me win two games with balls in hands before the 8s. Arno was undefeated. He's from France. He likes Sartre and can memorize a whole chess match in his head. Greg was undefeated till the doubles. Greg and I played on the King Bar dead rail table last season and still managed to let the rail beat us time and again in tonight's match. Maybe we should do Hot Yoga or something to work on our flexibility. I just can't believe what stubborn cunts we are. Enda had a better night than last week against Dolce Vita -- Enda Yo Life!! That's a great nickname. Johnny calls him Edna. That's a girl's name.

THE BET
The Bet remains about the same. Some say Stevie is leaving Boomtown Rats. Is that related? I have to work on my Segue-ways? Trans Fats may not be as harmful as previously thought. They will open the Kennedy Assassination files to the public in 2025, 13 years to go.

1. Ralph 1795 (Sucka can't stay over 1800)
2. Jeremy  1753 (Sucka stuck in Donutland)
3. Johnny 1727 (Sucka lost to Irina when he could have gained mad points)

See the whole team's rankings and stuff below. 

Players	Rating	Singles played	Doubles played
Greg "Antfarm" Antrim	1873	16	6
"Arno"	1832	17	9
Ra!ph-Michael "Laugh" Chiaia	1795	20	10
"CantDoKnow"	1753	1	1
Jeremy Anton	1753	7	3
Jesse Romero	1733	9	6
Johnny "THE HEX" Magyaros	1727	20	8
June S Han	1715	16	10
Yo "Colin" Yang	1676	2	1
"Enda yo life"	1637	4	2
MJ Kim	1625	2	0
Allen "2LS" Wiggins	1557	8	4

I'm still in a little big of shock of how much trouble it takes some people to understand the idea of alternate breaks, who elected these morons captain?
And they are seriously paying players for a fun amateur league? Give me a fucking break! Sublime sucks. I don't care how much people sing along. They still suck. Fuck them.

If anyone has any ideas to make the league better or Wednesday's more fun, tell me and I'll suggest them at the next Captain's Meeting.

Okay, it's 11:02 a.m. and I haven't been to bed yet. Peter Roxburgh is the devil. Like you didn't know.

It kind of looks like he knows what the fuck he's talking about.
Yeah Right!

One more thing, we've just won 11 weeks straight and 10 of them in Double Digits. Let's keep in rolling!

Some shithead named Killa wrote his name on the whiteboard during league night. That cracked us up. Killa.

Week Ten 합격!

iTeam 10 - 5 Dolce Vita

Great night. I thought that sweet life had a good chance against us and we hung in there and played well enough for an important 10-5 win over Jim Dewey's team. There are a few really good shooters on that team. Im falling asleep i typed tea instead of team. "They have a really good tea!" I'll check in tomorrow. I'm blogging using the phone now, which is a pain.

On the computer now. There's no "i" in team, except on iTeam.

June has been playing abso-fucking-luba-toosy great week in and week out. Her streak came to an end at 10 - fantastic! Greg has flattened out but is still leading the team, playing a solid lead-off game every match. One more hot-streak and he'll be over 1900 again. He's definitely one of the top 10 players in the IPL (sex change or not, 'scuse me?). We had Enda Yo Life play again last night. I really enjoyed the doubles game with him. We had a tough shot and just picked up the cue ball and handed it to them. They then went on to have a massive brain freeze and shit all over themselves. The funny thing is that I ended up with a slightly easier version of the shot that Enda didn't want to shoot, the shot that made us hand them the cue ball, the move that deconstructed them psychologically. It's amazing how the average IPL player crumbles when directly challenged.

Johnny "Side Pocket" just missed an 8-ball run is his first game. He shot out the first 7 and had a decent leave for an 8-ball cut-shot into the corner pocket but flubbed it. I guess he was thinking about the run. I am often guilty of that. He went 2 out of 3 and lost around 9 points on the night. That's the chess rating system applied to pool for you. He also had to take about 20 shots at the left-side pocket last night, making about 15 of them. Thus he is dubbed Johnny Side Pocket.

Frustrating night for Arno, but he still managed to go 2 for 3. That's the sign of a really good player. He won the first singles on strong mental play and I'm really not sure how he and Johnny won the doubles. One thing I noticed last night is Jumi "Tequila Jo" really played badly. I remember her being really quite good. I don't know if she just had a bad night or really isn't as good anymore.

I practiced like dog shit. I couldn't make a single ball and then went on to be totally confident and make every hard shot I was given, weaving through Tom Vu's defense with not a worry in the world (I love nights like that!). I heard Enda saying "Quality" in my second singles game as the cue ball rolled into fine shape for the 8 after blasting a long corner-pocket shot with lots of spin on the cue-ball. I finally passed 1800. In terms of "the Bet" I'm on top by about 50 points right now. Anybody want to up the ante, Jeremy? I know that Johnny does. He was saying so last night. Anybody else want to make side bets?

Bonuses/Penalties
I made a little poll on the right sidebar for you to vote YES or NO on the issue. It it right under the slide show of photos.

Money tournament coming up. Who's going to play?


       Side Note:       
I have .avi files of an instructional pool series called the Encyclopedia of Pool Shots (I-V). If you would like them, just give me a memory stick and I'll copy them and bring them for you (You will need some memory). I really recommend them. They are entertaining, smart, and useful. It covers simple things like hitting massive draw to tougher concepts like banking/kicking systems. There's an important section on defense and some other cool things. You can see clips on youtube.com but watching the whole thing is more useful and makes you want to go and practice.

THE BET
No. 1 - Ra!ph-Michael "Laugh" Chiaia	1811	18	9
No. 2 - Jeremy Anton	1753	7	3
No. 3 - Johnny Magyaros	1737	18	7

Week #10 Preview

We are playing Sweet Life Dolce Vita or Vice Versa. It's a dumb redundant name anyway like calling ourselves Bless U. Te Bendiga. I didn't even like Bless U. Santa Mierda cause too much blessing and holiness. Anyway, iTeam isn't that hot either. B Team would have been better. or A Team. or Team.

Anyway. It seems my memory functions okay because I haven't heard any complaints about last week's score sheet.

The Funghis?

       SIDE NEWS:       

It was posted on IPL's Facebook pagehttp://www.facebook.com/groups/5419118089/ that one of the players from tonight's team steals cell phones and even stole a teammates phone, so heads up.

THE BET:
Johnny is catching Jeremy! I sniffed 1800 then lost my doubles game.

"Laugh" Chiaia	1785	16	8
Jeremy Anton	1753	7	3
Johnny Magyaros	1746	16	6

Mistakes, Bonuses, and Penalties

If anyone sees any glaring mistakes on the score sheet please tell me and i'll correct it. I'm really not 100% sure about everything. I thought IPL would update but I ended up doing by memory (not a strong suit) on Friday. For example, I can't remember for the life of me which token white guy on the team is Jeff "Gretsky" and which is Scott. I think Scott shaves his head and Jeff is on the good-looking side but a little gawky, but it could be reversed.

We had a blog for the Santa Mierda team and it had a Bonuses & Penalties Section. Looking back on it, it was actually pretty cool. It would have fined Johnny on Wednesday for missing the 8-ball hanging in the pocket. It would have punished Arno for playing a game over 21 minutes long (Johnny too^^) and it would have punished all of us who lost a game. It also would have given Arno a bit of money from each player for the Special Game.  If you're interested in implementing these ideas for iTeam just tell me. Even if you're not, check them out and see the result for the Santa Mierda season. Pretty Funny!

Week 9 Results: iTeam grills Hollywood (ㅋㅋㅋ)

“The heart dies, a slow death, 
shedding each hope like leaves... 
... until one day there are 
none. No hopes. Nothing remains.” 
― Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha 


I didn't know that Arthur Golden was talking about the participants of the IPL doubles games, errrr, okay, I mean, Slow Slow fucking SLOW games. The first doubles game took almost one hour to complete. Crazy. Never saw that before. Hope to never see it again.

Final Score:
Good Guys 11 v. Bad Guys 4


Last night took so long I have nothing to say about it. Everybody played okay. We still won 11 games even though our two highest ranked players only won one game a piece. June is our best shooter now two weeks in a row. I'm ahead in the bet, probably. I haven't seen the rankings. Jeremy is stuck in Japan -- suck-ah! Yo Yang is back. He and I played a beautiful doubles game even though we lost. They were so fucking annoying, one of them has a high pitched voice and was bitching incessantly throughout the game and got married to pointless defense, so Yo Yang and I put on an offensive clinic making cool creative shots, showing that any ball can go in any time, before just giving it away like shitheads. We lost two of three doubles as a team -- really? Yep, we suck big fat cocks. That's not insulting to June, is it? But she won her doubles, so I guess that's appropriate.

I put some rules and additions into the IPL forum. Support me if you slightly believe in me. I want to propose adding RAndy's Bar into the IPL mix.

Would anyone play in a new league with 5 players a night in the format of quick races? Or in a one-on-one weekly race. Surely there could be way better formats than the IPL. Just food for thought so get a buffet plate.

             The Bet                

1. Ralph 1785
2. Jeremy 1753
3. Johnny 1746

all within striking distance!

Week #9 Preview

We play somebody this week. Let me check and see who it is because I simply cannot remember for the life of me. We are doing pretty well so far. We haven't lost a match for the week yet. Week #1 was our closest to a loss. We play Hollywood Grille. They have three pretty good players. We need to play smart and keep winning weeks before the rough patch of our schedule begins.

Week #8 -- iTeam v. Full Wolves

iTeam 12 
Arguing Bozos 3

We played the Full Wolves. It was a really weird night. Really weird. Karry yelled at Naeem and kicked him off the team. He deserved it. He was calling her names and grabbing her wrist. Also he couldnt figure out how to use the magic rack and rudely tossed it aside. The jist is she got mad, yelled and screamed, used the F word incorrectly and awkwardly in many different configurations, and then kicked him off the team (all while I played Khan in my second game). That game had a bit about me fouling with my shirt and some shithead-without-logic on their team tried to point that out by putting his belly on the ball. Anyway, I shot in the 8 ball from a fully upright position, so fuck you, and fuck her too C. Lo.

Greg fell from 1900. Strangely this team is his kryptonite. I suppose going 2-3 against a team you don't like playing while shooting like shit is pretty good. I reminds me of my night against Phillies. Arno didnt play and, surprisingly, we didn't need him. M.J. took his spot and shot awesome. She banked in the 8 ball in game one and shot a tough 8 ball in game two. June played fucking awesome. All her games were quick and tight. Allen struggled. He hasn't played recently and needs an hour of practice. Johnny played good enough although he struggled to make the 8 ball all night. Still he played smart and was rewarded with a 3-3 performance bringing the rankings in the bet pretty close. I played okay. Didn't shoot great but didn't do anything too stupid either. I had one good bank shot in doubles (my highlight^^). 12-3 is a pretty good night. And the entertainment value of the Wolves fighting made it pretty fun.

  MAGIC RACK                                                         
I have an extra Magic Rack if anyone wants to buy one. It costs $16 at Seyberts and i'm taking 20,000 Won. I gave one to Bless U for Ken and the other team to use if they want. Greg gave me one of those key-chain chalks, which is pretty cool.

POSTS ON THE IPL SITE:
Please check my posts and support them or propose alternatives. I am advocating getting special points for special games. I am also advocating that we lag for the break.

THE BET

Ra!ph-Michael "Maestro" Chiaia	1767	14	7
Bill "CantDoKnow" Huang	1753	1	1
Jeremy Anton	1753	7	3
Johnny Magyaros	1734	14	5

Preview of Week #8

We play Full Moon Wolves. This will be the first week without Jesse (out indefinitely) and Jeremy (out 4-6 weeks). Those of us still playing and in it need to focus and win. Any losses tomorrow will be a loss of a LOT of ranking points.

As of now in the Bet it is

1. Jeremy 1753
2. Ralph 1741
3. Johnny 1706

although the pool picks

1. Ralph 57.1%
2. Jeremy 28.6%
3. Johnny 14.3%

(ask people to vote, lol)